EidoScope

The observable examined

Resilience

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Today I thought of Lechi a lot. I am not sure what triggered it.

It may have been the blanket I still have on my passenger seat in the car. This blanket (incidentally from Stanford Hospital) was in use to make the bucket seat level so that she could slide into position on a level surface instead of having to scoot over the elevated perimeter of the seat.

It brought back a flood of memories around how excruciatingly painful, ordinary (to most of us) movements, became for Lechi. Getting down the stairs, the “short walk” to the car, and then getting into the car. This sequence of movements were greatly exaggerated in time, required minute maneuvers, and great effort to get into position for each activity.

Our frequent hospital visits (a short ride by most measures) were pretty dreadful as it seemed like every small pebble, crevice, and undulation on the road surface, came alive and caused unbearable shooting pain in her lower back. There were days,when I had the hazards on, and drove slowly on busy streets.

(Incidentally, there is a side story here about reactions of the general public viewing us as a nuisance on the street. It is a sad commentary on how self-absorbed and impatient our society has become. )

It may also have been because I heard about the passing of Elizabeth Edwards, also of cancer, (wife of John Edwards – this dickhead was having an affair when his wife was terminally ill. I wonder if such people are evolutionary anomalies.) on NPR. She wrote a book called “Resilience”. When I look back, Lechi was the embodiment of this spirit. One way she demonstrated this by her resolve to brave the pain associated with the commute to UCSF, walker, or wheelchair notwithstanding (I can’t quite convey how extraordinary this is having witnessed every moment of it). I can cite so many other examples. Lechi was grace personfied even under enormous distress.

No matter how I think about it, it just feels wrong that Lechi had to suffer this much. All of us wellwishers could not do much more than be helpless bystanders. It reminds me of a tale in the Bhagavatam, where an elephant, inspite of being surrounded by his herd, suffers alone, when trapped in the jaws of a crocodile.

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Written by asterix98

December 8, 2010 at 6:52 am

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